5 LIFE LESSONS a Year of Chaos Taught Me

Taking on a huge project? I can relate. This year has been a rollercoaster with three weddings (one my own!), a funeral, and a career change. Throughout it all, I learned some surprising life lessons that linger on. If you're embarking on something big too, you might find these insights helpful.

Let’s begin!

Note: Some of the links below are affiliate links. At no additional cost to you, I may earn a small commission if you purchase through those links. You can read my full affiliate disclosure here.

In This Post:

• The Craziest of Crazy Years
• 5 Life Lessons
• More Fun Posts With Life Lessons

This is my first truly, 100% free morning in… um, forever? No to-dos on scraps of paper. No tasks on my phone's calendar. No appointments to hurry to. NO. PLANS. AT. ALL!

Just me, my coffee (still warm, still perfect), and this big, big, beautiful day ahead of me. I'm perched on the couch, looking out the window, and feeling more still than I have in months.

The winter-blue sky is dotted with little blue tits (hehe, that’s how they are called in English? In German it’s “Blaumeisen”), racing, chasing each other, and having loud, chirpy conversations.

Ahhh, this lovely, lovely sense of peace.

Until ...

I notice a weird feeling. Not bad, not good, just... strange? A little restless. A little hollow.

What is this? And then it hits me. OMG. I know this. I know this! I haven’t felt it in ages.

I’m bored.

Bored!? Seriously? I’ve had every possible feeling this year—joy, stress, grief, exhaustion, excitement, all of it. But boredom? Not once. This year has been so packed, boredom didn’t stand a chance.

The Craziest of Crazy Years

Back in March, my partner and I decided to get married this year instead of next. I thought, okay, that’s a lot, but manageable. Then, my best friend’s wedding popped onto the calendar, followed by my cousin’s (in Japan, mind you!). That alone would’ve been a full year. But no, I had to toss in a career change because the opportunity was too irresistible. Finally (because life always has the last word), we also faced a loss in the family.

It’s been a lot. A lot. Like one of those years that feels like it’s crammed with a decade’s worth of stuff. Every emotion on the spectrum showed up at some point. Every emotion except boredom. Until this morning ...

Do you know what the oddest thing about it is, though? It's that boredom feels like a gift at this very moment. Because boredom means I finally have the brain space to think and to reflect. Like, realizing that this year has given me so much more than an album of memories (plus plenty of anecdotes to share at dinner parties).

It's given me a good handful of life lessons. And it’s not just about planning a wedding (which, yep, is as crazy and wonderful as everyone says), but about any big, life-changing, all-consuming task. Like moving houses/states/countries. Starting a new career. Creating a blended family. Fixing up a house. The kind of projects that take over your life for months. You know the likes I'm talking about, right?

5 Life Lessons

So, this year has gifted me with so, so many things, including a couple of life lessons that I'd like to share with you. In case you’re staring down a big project, here are the five lessons I’ve learned this year that might help.

#1: You can’t have it all.

This sounds harsher than I mean it to. But really, it's just math: 24 hours in a day, no more, no less. And when a big, all-consuming project elbows its way into your already crowded life, something's got to go.

What are you ready to give up? But perhaps more fundamentally: What will you not sacrifice, come what may? These priorities - your non-negotiables - become your compass. They'll be your guiding pillars when everything else feels like it's up for grabs.

For me, in the lead-up to the wedding, it was all about feeling good in my own skin on the big day. So, it was pretty easy to decide on my top 3 priorities: healthy eating, regular exercise, and enough sleep to keep the wheels turning. But to make time for them, I needed to take time away from other stuff that I loved: reading books, meeting friends, binge-watching shows, writing on my blog, nice walks. Even a visit to my grandfather in Romania had to wait.

Was it easy? You bet it wasn't. But I kept myself motivated by thinking about the beautiful event, the big day(s)! And also by reminding myself that I get to chill and relax afterward. (Not to forget the promise of indulging in as much wedding cake as I could manage on my wedding day- which I did, btw 😊)

#2: Know what you’re signing up for.

I mean, you won't know everything - especially if it's your first time doing something big – but doing a little research can really help. It's good to understand what you're signing up for. Try to figure out the basics. For example, how much time will this take? How much money? How much mental energy? And who can you ask for help when (not if) things get overwhelming?

Also, build in some buffer time. Because life? It's gonna life. Deadlines, surprise hiccups, sick days, or last-minute changes- they're basically a guarantee. If your project has a hard deadline - a wedding date, a move-in day - work/schedule backward and give yourself plenty of breathing room along the way.

And here's the thing I cannot stress enough:

YOU. NEED. BREAKS!

A free day from time to time, or even a week off, can make all the difference. About two months into wedding planning, when stress basically was my full-time job, and I couldn't see straight anymore, we hit pause and spent a week in Denmark. We agreed ahead not to talk about weddings. Instead, we just wandered around Copenhagen, eating our weight in vegan Danish pastries (to-die-for Spandauer at the Bistro Verde), and soaking up all the hygge vibes. It was exactly what needed to reset.

#3: Communication is key.

A big project will always involve at least one other person, and if communication breaks down, stress will skyrocket. My partner and I weren’t a well-oiled planning duo at the start. We’d never taken on anything this complex together, and figuring out how to divide tasks, share updates, and make decisions took time.

Early on, we established a system that worked for us: clear task assignments, regular check-ins (usually over coffee in the morning, which, btw, became a lovely ritual for us, especially on sunny summer days sitting on our balcony), and deciding which topics needed face-to-face discussions versus quick texts or emails.

After a while, it worked nicely, kept us moving forward—and kept misunderstandings to a minimum.

#4: Visualize the finish line.

Big projects are a lot, right? It's so easy to get absolutely sucked into the chaos and lose sight of why you're doing it in the first place. But here's a little trick: from the very beginning, try to picture the finish line. Like, what's it going to feel like when this is all done? What are you gonna do? Will you throw a party? Book a trip? Take a nap so long it qualifies as hibernation?

Having a clear vision keeps you going. It’s what lifts you when you hit a wall or find yourself in one of those low, messy valleys (because … big projects come with those).

#5: Being busy all the time is addictive.

You may have heard that it takes 21 days to make something a habit. It apparently may actually take six months for that to become your new normal. And, omg, does it ever apply to a slammed-to-capacity schedule! There comes a point where the chaos - the unending lists, the constant busyness - fades out and is no longer overwhelming, it's just regular routine. Like, this is who I am now. The hustle mode becomes your new normal.

But here's the thing: slowing down is necessary and healthy, but soooo haaaaard. Uncomfortably hard. When you've been in busy-bee mode for so long, stopping feels unnatural. That's where I am right now: trying to figure out how to be okay with a little boredom.

So, here it is, the big one: give yourself permission to actually slow down when you're done. Sit in the quiet for a (month-long) minute. Reflect on what you just did because it's probably huuuuge. Soak up the joy of having finished, and let yourself rest and recharge before you dive headfirst into the next big thing.

---

Seriously, it has been a wild ride of a year. Craaaazy! And now I just need to sit here and be. Process it all. I am so very grateful not only for the people who joined me on this crazy ride but also for what I have learned and the experiences that have grown me and made me feel a rainbow of feelings.

Speaking of feelings, there's another weird one—this one’s coming straight from my belly. Which feels ... empty. Like, incredibly empty. I can almost hear it echoing “lunchlunchlunch”. So, I’ll leave you for now and head to the kitchen. Oh, and I have another feeling: lunch might just be followed by a short nap. Wait, scratch 'short'. Make it 'lavish.' That feels more appropriate.

What massive project have you tackled recently? Share your biggest life lessons learned in the comments below!

Wishing you planty of wisdom to embrace life's abundance,
Ramona

More Fun Posts With Life Lessons

♥